peeves.

And on Day 5, we name five irritating things about boys and girls.  Everyone knows that girls are perfect, of course, but for the sake of this challenge I'll play along.  I'm a good sport, what can I say?  Here's to stereotyping and generalising!

Five things that grind my gears about myself, as a woman:

• We worry about things too much.  We worry about what people think of us and as a result, spend all our time comparing ourselves to other girls.  We worry that we're not as pretty, or smart or pure or skinny or in love with the environment or career minded as the next girl and crikey, what will everything think?!  The answer is "nothing".  People won't think about it.  Very few people are thinking about you all the time, ladies.  This worrying business is time-wasterly and boring and pointless and impossible to stop.
• JAYSUS CAN WE STOP IT WITH THE SLUT SHAMING ALREADY.  And the fat shaming.  And all that.
• We're really emotional.  Rationally, of course, but also incredibly irrationally emotional.  And double-standard-y.  And change mind-y.  And grudge hold-y.
• The way we talk.  I know, it's not all girls but you know the girls I mean.  Girls like me.  Who say "totes" and "def" and "I knowwwww right?" and shriek and get all high pitched when they're excited/annoyed and what not. 
• We over analyse everything.  All of the things.  Why so and so said those words in that order in that tone at that time of day via that communication medium to that person whilst wearing those clothes and standing in that stance while looking sideways (were they looking sideways?  Or do they just have weird squinty eyes?  Have they always had squinty eyes?  Are they ill?  Are their contacts uncomfortable?) at that animal/vegetable/mineral etc.  See this and then see yourself as a woman and then go "yikes, that is me" and then wish you could do something about it BUT YOU CAN'T.

Five things that grind my gears about men:

• Slut shaming.  Rape jokes.  Asking if it's "that time of the month".  Unless you're asking me whether it's that time of the month where I punch you in the throat, then no.  No, no, nope. 
• Always (oh come on.  Often, at the very least) looking for sexy time.  Which leads me to the "Hey" text, and variations thereof.  We all know what you mean when you text "Hey" at 2am.  Or anytime, actually.
• They're so simple.  I don't mean like simple "duh" but simple "clear, to the point, say what they mean" which, when coupled with women who over analyse any/everything makes them near on impossible to work out, because there is no way that we're going to be satisfied with simplicity.  I don't know that this is a man problem, actually.  What I mean is, I don't understand men.
• Their obsession with putting their hands in their pants.  What is this constant rearranging/itching business?  Is it really that uncomfortable all of the time?  Ohhhh which leads me to guys sitting with their legs spread mad far apart.  Would it kill one knee to be within a foot of the other?
• Having no idea about things.  Sometimes guys are so thick, and it comes not from mental retardation, but from genuinely not understanding that some things are not okay to say/do.    Should you wear your old jeans to a wedding?  No.  Should you comment on a women's meal choice?  No.  Ughhhh.

Conclusion?  We're all idiots.  It's a surprise the world has yet to implode from the weight of our stupidity.