scaredy-cat.

It's Day 17, you guys!  I've passed the halfway point!  Bam!  Exclamation marks!

Today, the topic is "things that make you scared".  I'm unsure as to the level of scaredy-cat-ness that this is referring too, so I'm just going to list a random selection of things that I am, to varying degrees, scared of.  Because I am terrified of everything.

1. Grating my fingers.  I have never had a bad experience with a grater however I constantly think about grating my fingernails off, and then the rest of my fingers (as if I wouldn't immediately stop).  UGHHHHHHH thinking about it makes my fingers tingle.

2. Other people being up high.  I'm not that pumped about heights myself, however if I have to get up somewhere, I will.  But the second you make me watch someone else doing something at a height (basically ALL THE TIME at my old job at the canyon swing), my heart is in my throat and I'm all about ready to heave it out, in sheer panic.  Once I had to paint the railing around the balcony at the swing site.  I did the inside, and Rob, who I worked with, hooked himself up to hang off the roof and kind of abseil down so he could do the outside (hanging over a cliff-face.  Not exaggerating.).  I spent the entire time refusing to look at him because it made me so nervous.

highest of the high up places a.k.a my old workplace.

3. Being forever alone.  Right now I'm happy being alone, but the forever part is terrifying because what if all the boys hate me forever and then I am a spinster and have to get loads of cats and hey I love cats don't worry everybody it's okay.

4. People dying.  Specifically my family.  I mean, obviously I am upset when anyone I know dies, or anyone who is important to someone who is important to me dies, and so on and so forth, however I am very, very scared of anyone in my family dying.  What the hell are you meant to do about that?  This has happened to people that I know and I am every day astounded that they haven't just dropped dead themselves (you know what I mean) out of an actual inability to cope.  I know some bloody amazing people.  I am scared that I am not like that.

5. Walking around outside in the dark.  Particularly downhill.  I hate not knowing where I'm stepping and permanently convinced I'll take a wrong step in the dark and do the splits and skid down a hill.  I am scared of that, so I take the tiniest steps possible and will feel around until I'm sure I have a decent footing, therefore cementing my place in everyone's lives as the slowest walker they have ever known.

6. My money situation.  My no money situation.

7. Pregnancy.  Where would I put a baby?  Also, how did I get pregnant?  (see fear #3)

8. People sneaking up on me.  I quite easily get into a "zone".  If I am working, I am in that zone.  If I am reading, I am in a reading zone.  If I am internerding...  you get the idea.  I will actually open a book and be in the zone immediately, which makes it incredibly easy for anyone to give me a fright.  Like a 'shit the bed' kind of  fright.  Hours of fun for everyone else.  You guys all suck.

So, there's some cool fears for you to think about.  Maybe if you weren't afraid of these before, you are now?  Join the club, my friend.  Join the club.  Hey guys!  Any decision we make could totally ruin our lives!  Have a fun day!